The journey to finding an ideal partner can often be challenging. There are highs and lows, heartbreaks and often lots and lots of first dates.
But despite the ups and downs, the search for a life partner is often seen as the most important task in our lives. We sacrifice a lot to find ‘the one’ and we will go to extraordinary lengths to make relationships work.
Unfortunately, most people have experienced thinking that they have met their true life partner only to be disappointed later down the line. True love has been known to masquerade as lust.
So how do you know when you really have found your partner for life? These 8 signs will help you figure that out.
1. You actively listen to each other.
Active listening is when you are truly tuned in to what another person is saying. You’re responding to their thoughts in real time, rather than thinking about what you’re going to say next.
You really want to learn from what the other person is saying and not turn the conversation around so that the focus is on you. For life partners, this kind of connection is an everyday activity.
2. The little things are taken care of.
How you like your coffee, which side of the bed you sleep on, where you keep the spare key… all of these seemingly mundane things make a difference in a long-term partnership. Life partners find a harmonious routine and know how the little things contribute to the bigger picture.
3. You just know.
When it comes to finding the right relationship, ‘just knowing’ is perhaps one of the most frustrating phrases a single person can hear. Indeed it doesn’t sound very tangible to someone looking for their life partner.
But, soul mates often express feeling ‘right’ when they met their life partner. Others describe the sensation as ‘coming home’ or finding their ‘other half’.
4. You work towards the same goals.
Sharing the vision of a future together is something all life partners have in common. Whether you’re imaging yourselves in your 60s and 70s holding hands and tending to the garden or cruising around the world, whatever the vision is, the important thing is that it is shared and that you’re actively working towards that future together.
5. You’re each other’s biggest cheerleaders.
When you first meet someone special, your initial reaction is often to gush about how amazing they are to your friends and families. When you meet your life partner, this enthusiasm doesn’t wear off.
You might not feel the need to shout it from the rooftops like when you first met, but, when you look at them you still think they are one of the best people you’ve ever met.
6. You accept each other’s flaws.
No one is perfect, not even your life partner. Relationships that are built to last recognize each person’s flaws and accepts them. Often these less desirable traits are domestic, like forgetting to change the dustbin or the inability to stack the dishwasher.
But other times, tendencies towards jealousy or stubbornness can reveal themselves in a life partnership. Whatever the flaws are, the important thing is stepping back, seeing them for who they really are and loving them all the same.
7. Your friends and family get it.
If you’ve met your life partner, you should have the support of your true friends and family (although as everyone knows this can be complex). If the relationship is meant to be, people you really care about will recognize it’s importance.
People often describe how easy it was to introduce their life partner into their family or group of friends. Like ‘just knowing’, soul mates say their family is naturally at ease with their other half from the beginning, almost like they had met somewhere before.
8. You are really honest with each other.
Life partners are their authentic selves around each other. There is no pretense or claiming to be someone they’re not. No faking cheerfulness or causing drama for the sake of it. There is a quiet recognition that, if you’re going to spend your lives together – you may as well be yourselves because the truth would have to come out someday.
If you’re looking at this list and it feels very familiar, then the chances are you’ve been lucky enough to meet your life partner. If there is nothing you can connect with, then you’re probably still looking.
It’s not always the easiest search, but there is ample advice on how to meet your life partner out there. Ironically some of the most common words of wisdom are to stop looking and they will appear.
However and whenever you find your life partner, cherish them when you do. You’ve been searching long enough.